Friday, October 14, 2011

Victim Soul Vocation Confirmed

Yesterday I met with my spiritual director.  He has many years as prelate and vast experience in the spiritual life.  I am blessed by God to have him be the earthly guide and guardian of my soul.

After much prayer and discernment on his part of what I have long sensed and acted upon the inner knowing of what seems to be a dual vocation of victim soul and hermit, my spiritual director affirmed that I am a victim soul.  He said it is quite beautiful.

At home, I had physical and emotional reaction.  My body realized how tired it is, and my mind was weary.  The emotions became intense, burning, with flames fanned by some key memories of two incidents in adolescence in which I knew something of my destiny but not in particulars--but had made an intense commitment of what I would do, without knowing what that would be, for God.

Those memories, along with the confirmation of victim soul vocation, coming from this venerable bishop, coupled with some powerful dreams of the past week, brought up an overflow of yet more emotion which drained the body and mind so the soul could absorb at some level subconsciously, the reality of what this means.

I share this for the benefit of those who have read these blogs and questioned the credibility and/or validity of the vocation of victim soul, and for those who have been concerned and wrote elsewhere detraction of what I have written in these blogs, concerning the vocation of victim soul in the Church historically and today, as well as the viability of the vocation for those who God calls either prior to their making an offering or later on, fulfilling their offering to do something for God not yet knowing what that was going to be.

God bless His Real Presence in you.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just spent the last hour pouring out my heart in a comment and was told I exceeded the word limit. I was brought here to a question I asked you 3 years ago. I was shocked. I saw you wrote recently and I felt there was something here for me God wanted me to know. Then I realized why He sent me here. I found the answer that I was seeking- one I am sure I have been given over and over but still need to hear. Love God and neighbor, frequent the sacraments, say yes to God's will. I don't need to know anything more. God knows and that is enough. Thank you for helping me tonight. I am glad God led me here tonight. I see you are officially a victim soul now. It is an odd thing to talk about and I hope that you will take my next words in a loving way- as a sister in Christ. I want to at once say how joyful I am for you and congratulations. I cannot wish away your sufferings because God loves you and souls too much to let me do that. I will pray for you though and I pray you save many souls. God loves you very much! I wish there was more I could do for you, even if only to empathize with you and let you know that you are not alone, yet suffering is an alone thing between us and God, no matter the good intentions of others. I will pray you have a beautiful advent this year and that the Christ Child comes to you in a very special way! There will be joys amidst the suffering, and you will see them more than others. That is a mystery of suffering. I know I whine and cry to God sometimes, and pray my tiny sufferings be lifted. God is always tender with me. He did show me that if He gave me the full weight of the cross I think I carry, that I would die. He has been carrying it for me, only giving me a tiny portion. How tender and gentle He is. How loving. No parent wants a child to suffer, so He silently carries our crosses for us, not even letting us know, so that we might think we did it all ourselves. If only we could look into Jesus's eyes when we want to cry, nothing would matter anymore. He loves us so! Happy Thanksgiving. Many blessings to you

6:27 PM  
Blogger nothing said...

I do think I understand what you are writing and am thankful for any which way that what I share here is helpful to anyone. It is a risk to bear ones imperfections of soul and some of the intimacies, at least rather anonymously. It just seems there are many of us out in the great world, and we share aspects of suffering and of offering the suffering, to be reminded that we are never alone in His Real Presence but also in His Real Presence in fellow sufferers. I do understand the humor, in a way, of having a vocation validated by one in the Church, when the soul knew it from within a long time ago. Yet, the saying "Yes, this is your vocation [along with the hermit vocation]" does add onus to the effort, and suddenly I realized how I have short-changed His Real Presence with my paltry plaints and weak endurance. So I'm trying to focus better, once again, and it is what we can call a bitter-sweet event, whether or not this particular vocation is validated or not. Any vocation certainly has its share of sufferings! God bless His Real Presence in you!

6:46 AM  
Blogger nothing said...

And, I do agree, yes, that to love God and neighbor, frequent the sacraments, and say yes to God's will is enough.

Writing is a means of painting the scene of what most would not need to read or others need to write. Somehow, I need to write for those few who need to read. Some group of people had been offended and said they were reporting what I wrote as errant to the Vatican. In this confirmation of a vocation although not one with canon laws detailing it, has been written in encyclicals two or three times, at least. I did not want people who may also have this as a primary mission in life, to waste it, having been misled by those who condemned it. My writing now is on other blogs, just two--one more fun in a way, and the other more deep about His Real Presence. Hope this makes sense.

6:52 AM  

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