Upon Asking a Question of St. Luke

Perhaps sharing the answer of someone's asking, years ago, for ways that I could be helped or healed from pain--might help others who suffer.

He says:

"Simply love is greater than anything he could do. And why don't I believe him? Why don't I simply love and remember to love?

It's the pain that reminds me to love and to do that which I am supposed to do. If I didn't have a very strong reminder (that I am too young in my faith), I would be off.

And I would be called back into the world too easily. And that I am not ready to not have a good, firm reminder."

I say:

"If that pain were healed I would be free to use all of my energy to love."

He says:

"You are but a child. That was a very sweet but childish thought."

He explains further:

"But pain can be relieved when I attain unconditional love for myself and for others, when I attain the status of those before. John. Of the Christ.

"Attaining unconditional love is not an upward movement. It's more of a horizontal movement. And that is a very simple development that doesn't necessarily take time. It's not the time It's the depth of the learning, the depth of the faith and the love. That it is the great belief that all things are possible, and of learning that and of staying with it.

He tells me that:

"People in our lives--it is not just me--anyone could strive for this that I happen to desire very much. And that this pain is a strengthening device. And that, yes, [one can be] a rare and beautiful bird in this lifetime. And that part of [that] rare beauty is the innocence, of the naivete of a child, of wanting and believing and not realizing that [one] is rare and beautiful. And of not becoming what we call 'a conceited person' but innocently strive forth. That is what anyone could have.

"But my spirit is open to this growth, and I am willing to endure whatever pain. And remember that pain at other levels and dimensions is sheer joy. Wherefore I must not fall back into the pain and how the world perceives pain. But it is so easy for a person living in these times to view from the world.

"And this world is so much like an evil sponge with tentacles that reaches out and grabs the people and sucks them back into the mouth of the evil. We don't see the evil. We remain at this very banal level.

"And that is what I do when I don't remember the joy of the pain. When I fight against the pain, it is from the demands--the demands of other people--who want me to not have pain, but do not understand that I can learn and grow and strive toward that which my heart desires from the very beautiful point of the joyful pain that I bear."

This Sixteenth Sunday in Ordinary Time I must reflect on this wisdom given two decades past. I am still but a child, not far in my faith. It is the love that will increase the faith. And during the night, the over-done body's pain needed reminding that suffering is sheer joy. Today is for rest and prayer and love.

What about the street man who after Mass asked me if I knew anyone who had a couple of dollars he could borrow? I said I did not know of anyone. I had been advised to not give out cash to those who asked, for it is likely they would spend it on alcohol or drugs. So I suggested he ask at the rectory, as they sometimes have fast-food coupons. He asked, and the priest said he did not have any. Then another parishioner, an older man, called him over to his car and gave him a folded bill. The one begging was gone in a flash.

So I must ask again if I should have given the man a couple of dollars? And to pray again what is love, what is simply love? Perhaps I must get some fast-food coupons to have handy. Or, to pray more for the homeless, the reasons they are homeless, and any addictions they may suffer. And to keep donating to the St. Vincent de Paul food pantry.

And to pray with much love for those who are depressed, who want to end their lives. I must pray for the suffering in the world (but not as the world views)--suffering of others who may not comprehend the holy love in suffering that I am yet after two decades and a lifetime, learning to comprehend.

Love eases the pain by helping pain evolve and grow, into yet more love. John the Baptist loved and suffered. Christ suffers; He loves as God, for God is love and He is God. It is said that the Holy Spirit is the enactor of love and binds with love the Three Persons of the Trinity as One.

Keep striving for unconditional love.

Love to suffer; suffer to love.